Sometimes....
September 6th 2007 08:57
I received this email today and I thought I would share the laughs with you...
"Sometimes when I reflect back on all the wine I drink I feel shame. Then I look into the glass and think about the workers in the vineyards and all of their hopes and dreams. If I didn't drink this wine, they might be out of work and their dreams would be shattered. Then I say to myself, "It is better that I drink this wine and let their dreams come true than be selfish and worry about my liver."
~ Jack Handy
WARNING: The consumption of alcohol may leave you wondering what the hell happened to your bra and panties.
"I feel sorry for people who don't drink. When they wake up in the morning, that's as good as they're going to feel all day. "
~Frank Sinatra
WARNING: The consumption of alcohol may create the illusion that you are tougher, smarter, faster and better looking than most people.
"When I read about the evils of drinking, I gave up reading."
~ Henny Youngman
WARNING: The consumption of alcohol may lead you to think people are laughing with you.
"24 hours in a day, 24 beers in a case. Coincidence? I think not."
~ Stephen Wright
WARNING: The consumption of alcohol may cause you to think you can sing.
"When we drink, we get drunk. When we get drunk, we fall asleep. When we fall asleep, we commit no sin. When we commit no sin, we go to heaven. So, let's all get drunk and go to heaven!"
~ Brian O'Rourke
WARNING: The consumption of alcohol may cause pregnancy.
"Beer is proof that God loves us and wants us to be happy."
~ Benjamin Franklin
"Without question, the greatest invention in the history of mankind is beer. Oh, I grant you that the wheel was also a fine invention, but the wheel does not go nearly as well with pizza."
~ Dave Barry
WARNING: The consumption of alcohol may cause you to tell your friends over and over again that you love them.
WARNING: The consumption of alcohol may make you think you can logically converse with members of the opposite sex without spitting.
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Comment by Ash
Flashes of memories
Funny! I`m with Jack on this one - I mean how selfish to quash all those dreams! hic
Hope you are well.
Hugs
Ash
Comment by katyzzz
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MS Paint Art
CAKEerr GRAPES, as Marie Antoinette would say, I'm here to recruit for the temperance league, would you like to sign the pledge?Disgusting suggestions but very funny, our meetings are twice a week, right next to alcoholics unanimous.
Almost first in line, after that typsy Ash, no wonder she can't understand my post.
katyzzz...there has to be at least one party pooper on every Orble.
Comment by Anonymous
TRacy here, I couldn't log into my own blog, ah well.
I agree with your choice and I also liked:
~Frank Sinatra
It'd good to laugh isn't it?
Hope you're getting some rest,
Tracy
Comment by Anonymous
Tracy here, as I said to Ash,I can't log in...
This made me laugh:
Disgusting suggestions but very funny, our meetings are twice a week, right next to alcoholics unanimous
My drinking days are mostly over unless it's accidental but these made me laugh. It's the elements of truth in them that work for me.
Bye and have a nice night,
Tracy
Comment by David
They're all funny. Jack and Henry's appeal to me most.
Comment by Tracy
Movies and Life
Yes, I had a good laugh when this was sent onto me...I thought it was only fair to share,
Tracy
Comment by Nickoftime's Sanity Corner
oh now this was funny! Great stuff! I needed the laughs this morning!
Take care,
Nick
Comment by D. Armenta
The Florida Keys and Everglades
The Black Sheep Chronicles
What constitutes bad manners?
The male mystique
Debate Fan
L.A.M.P.
Comment by Tracy
Movies and Life
Glad you enjoyed them, it's always good to have a morning laugh isn't it?
Byeee
Comment by Tracy
Movies and Life
Comment by Lilla
From The Home Front
Enviro Warrior
Dream Herald
Esoteric Bookshop
I am on and off on this topic... atm?
Off. Last month?
A glass of wine, nightly.
I guess I am not an addict, nor a binger... from some of these reports, that may be a blessing.
Great Post
Lilla ...
Comment by Tracy
Movies and Life
The irony is that I hardly drink any more, it sounds like you’re the same. I now just have the odd drink. My drunken nights out are gone but I had fun (when I was younger). But thought these were hilarious and true...people feel invincible when they drink which I think is part of the lure.
Byeee
Comment by Mr Nice Guy
Pop Culturist
Pop Rock Factory
There's a saying a friend of mine delivered at a wedding once that I've never forgotten.
From man's sweat and God's love, beer came into the world. -- Saint Arnoldus
Funny stuff.
Stay well
MNG
Comment by Tracy
Movies and Life
Your friend is very wise,
Byeeee
Comment by Miswanderlust
Killer Beats
Ramble On
Hipnotherapy
Wonderful post for a Sunday evening!
mis
Comment by Tracy
Movies and Life
A belated thanks for your message!!
Tracy